A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to Heaven

I write book reviews and the book I'm reading now is called A Funny Thing Happened on the way to Heaven: (Or, How I Made Peace with the Paranormal and Stigmatized Zealots and Cynics in the Process). The title alone made me pick it out for review. When I got it in the mail I was surprised to learn it was written by lead singer of Slipknot, Corey Taylor. I was a little hesitant as I started the book, hoping it wasn't going to be a maudlin, over-the-top, in-your-face-motherfucker! account of this guy's run ins with ghosts. Well it is, but it's brilliantly funny and smart as well.

Taylor recounts in chilling detail the encounters he's had, beginning at a young age, with things that go bump in the night. I'm not done with the book yet, but so far I've read about a horrifying abandoned house in the woods that he and his friends broke into when he was a kid, a haunted mansion in the Hollywood Hills where Slipknot recorded one of their albums (and where he ran into a ghost butler while naked in the shower), and his own houses that have included odd things like a shadow man that followed around his then three-year-old son.

Because Taylor writes with such zest and wit, I'm too busy laughing to be scared. But after I put the book down, I start thinking about the stories he's shared. That shadow man, in particular, forced me to leave the hall light on last night.

The Odessa Catacombs

My friend sent me a link to this place on Atlas Obscura. Apparently Odessa has a large system of tunnels underneath the city, which dates back to the 1600s. During World War II, Ukrainian rebels hid from the Nazis in the catacombs, some of them staying for the duration of the entire war.

Nowadays, people go exploring in the tunnels and some never come back. In 2005, a group of teenagers decided to ring in the new year in the catacombs. One girl, Masha, got separated from her group of friends and never made it out. Her body wasn't found until two years later.

Today, a small area of the tunnels remains open to the public as a museum. However, if that doesn't scratch your itch to experience the place, you can hire a guide to bring you further in. I would bring lots of batteries for your flashlight and leave a trail of bread crumbs behind. . .

Terrifying Dolls

While I don't think they're as creepy as clowns, dolls can be pretty spooky. Just think Annabelle.
Buzzfeed has a collection of some utterly terrifying dolls. Check it out. 

WTF?

Halloween Creeps into the Craft Stores

Every August the Halloween stuff starts to materialize in the craft stores. I was in Michael's today and saw signs of October 31 looming in a middle aisle.

More Conjuring

I found this film trailer for the Conjuring that includes the real Perrons. It could have been a cheesy mess, but it's actually nicely done. . .

House of Darkness, House of Light

I just stumbled across this little gem on Youtube. It's a mini documentary in which the Perron family addresses their battle with "Bathsheba" in the farmhouse that inspired The Conjuring. It was interesting to see the family now and then. Andrea Perron, who was eleven years old when her family moved into the house, wrote the book House of Darkness, House of Light on which the movie was based.

Conjuring up the Blog Again

I'm back to this blog earlier than I have been in previous years. There's just something in the air that beckons that Halloween spirit. I'm like those crafters who start making vampire jewelry in July (actually I am).

Perhaps I'm inspired because I just saw The Conjuring - the film that documents a chilling case investigated by Ed and Lorraine Warren. I was particularly interested in the film because I was lucky enough to attend a few of the Warren's lectures before Ed passed away. Some friends and I were even lucky enough to spend the day with them on a ghost hunting tour, poking around haunted areas of Connecticut.

Anyway, the movie centers on the Perron family who bought an old farmhouse in Rhode Island. Not longer after they moved in, things started to go wrong. Very wrong. As in disembodied hands clapping in an old wardrobe and clocks stopping at 3:07 a.m. wrong. Vera Farmiga and Patrick Wilson do a fantastic job of personifying the Warrens. Vera's eyes are so pretty and she is fragile yet strong like Lorraine. I was incredibly impressed with how well Patrick Wilson mirrored Ed's Connecticut accent. Spot on! Lily Taylor was perfect as terrified mom Carolyn Perron and Ron Livingston was gorgeous as dad Roger. Yeah, he's easy on the eyes. Oh, and his acting was good up until the climactic scene where he seemed a little bored by something trying to yank his wife's soul into hell.

The cinematography was splendid. The early 70s came to life on screen and made me nostalgic for the days when we played simple games like "hide and clap" rather than video games on smart phones.

I won't give any plot points away, but I will say there was lots of chilling use of white sheets. And the climactic scene near the end will stay in my head forever. It's a classic haunted house story, albeit one that is beautiful, lush, and spooky as hell. Director James Wan has alluded to making more movies based on the Warren's cases. Something tells me it's going to involve their famous haunted doll, Annabelle.